


Soldier, Poet, King

by kakashionmain



Series: Songfics for the Soul (Winter - Spring 2021) [8]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Anger, Angst, Battle of Hogwarts, Character Study, Discrimination, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jealousy, Mirror of Erised, Person of Color Harry Potter, Person of Color Hermione Granger, Post-Battle of Hogwarts, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Resentment, Song Lyrics, Song fic, Survivor Guilt, The Christian imagery is a side effect of the song guys, The Dursleys are literally child abusers don’t play with me, The Golden Trio, Trauma, ac tu ally they r British so they are people of colour, but I am also Jewish so :/, character flaws, i tried with it, just saying, sorry in advance, with a u
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-01
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-17 20:42:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29722962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kakashionmain/pseuds/kakashionmain
Summary: There will come a soldierWho carries a mighty swordHe will tear your city down, oh lei oh lai oh LordOh lei, oh lai, oh lei, oh LordHe will tear your city down, oh lei oh lai oh Lord
Relationships: Hermione Granger & Harry Potter & Ron Weasley
Series: Songfics for the Soul (Winter - Spring 2021) [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2163474
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	Soldier, Poet, King

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There will come a soldier  
> Who carries a mighty sword  
> He will tear your city down, oh lei oh lai oh Lord  
> Oh lei, oh lai, oh lei, oh Lord  
> He will tear your city down, oh lei oh lai oh Lord

Ron Weasley was used to being overlooked — painfully so, to be honest. The youngest of six sons and born a mere year before lucky child number seven, the first girl born to House Weasley in roughly two centuries, Ron went overshadowed from the time he was little more than a babe. Hogwarts, supposed to be his breakout years, went largely the same. He was Ron, Fred and George’s bumbling brother; Ron, Percy’s less intelligent brother; Ron, Charlie’s less talented brother; Ron, Ginny’s annoying older brother; Ron, Hermione’s rude and rather stupid friend; Ron, Harry Potter’s sidekick. No matter what he did, it seemed Ron was always doomed to be defined in relation to someone else. He was Ron but never _just_ Ron.

(Ronald was never enough on his own.)

Ronald was many things, but he was not a liar, so he could admit — if only to himself — that he hated being overshadowed so. He hated being doomed to second place, hated how eyes skimmed right over him and on to someone else (usually Harry, occasionally Hermione). It burned deep in his stomach, a bubbling bonfire of acidic jealousy and longing, an uncontrolled flame of inadequacy.

(“Why can’t you be more like Percy, Ron? Why can’t you do better, Ron? Be smarter, Ron? Why are you so lacking, Ronald? Stop riding Harry’s coattails, Ron! Try harder, Ron! Be better, Ron!”)

He could also admit that his desperation to be seen had, on more than one occasion, led him to make some questionable decisions. Leaving Harry and Hermione alone in the tent, for one, and abandoning Harry for part of fourth year, for another. In hindsight, Ron could not begin to explain his reasoning for it. That is not to say he did not understand why he did it, so much as it being impossible to articulate the sheer magnitude of the longing that festered inside him for years and years, the rot only accelerated age 11 by the fabled Dream Mirror.

Oh, yes, the Mirror of Erised did _things_ to Ron’s brain. He had not recognized the Dream Mirror for what it was back then, but he knew now. He knew. He knew what he saw, and he knew what Harry saw. It figures a barmy bastard like Dumbledore would stick _the_ Dream Mirror in a school of children! And it figures _Harry_ would be the one to find it. His best mate had a superhuman nose for danger and the curiosity of a cat to go with it!

But now that Ron had the recognition — _the attention_ — he had craved for so long, he would gladly give it all up for a million and one more important things.

His innocence.

His brother.

Hermione sleeping through the night.

Harry gaining some weight.

George smiling again.

Colin Creevey stalking him and Harry again.

Seeing Tonk’s change her nose at the dinner table one last time.

Sitting through one more lesson taught by professor Lupin.

Teddy having his parents.

The hollow in Ginny’s cheeks filling.

The first years laughing in the Great Hall again.

He does not regret his journey with Harry, does not regret the peace, however tenuous, they have managed, by some miracle, to bring. Just... what Ron would not give to turn back time! To change things! To have the sun set on a better world! A world so good people would anticipate the sun rise, not dread it and the harsh, unavoidable reality of daylight.

If Ron could do something — anything — he would. He would steal a time-turner and run away into the night, an avenging angel! An anonymous soldier, protecting his loved ones! He would do it in a heartbeat. But he cannot. Time travel does not work like that, Ron knows. Hermione told him so, so it must be true. Or at least the established, working theory of time travel, at any rate.

The real battle, though, is not finding a way to turn back time, it is finding a way to cope with its steady march forward. Ron has spent his most formative years marching to the drum beat of War — he has no idea how to match the usual beat of peace. The tide of War swept him away and spat him out on an unfamiliar shore. That is why, Hermione says, he is obsessed with time turning: because he wants to return to _normal_. Because Ron’s normal is eyes glancing over him and desperately praying that Death will do the same. Ron is a soldier forged in blood and shadows, not light and scar tissue.

(The real battle is knowing that he would not be able to pull away from the Dream Mirror if he stumbled upon it again. Not this time.)

(The real battle is knowing that even now, when he has achieved what was once his heart’s truest desire, he is still so desperately unhappy, longing for better days.)

But Ron, much like life, goes on. He has to because Harry and Hermione cannot, not really, not like he can.

(Ron is not particularly strong or smart or funny or charismatic or special. He has been outshone his entire life, but that is okay. Ron is enough for Harry and Hermione, and that is more than enough for him.)


End file.
